You might be a redneck if you watch cartoons long after your kids get bored.

I used to say that whenever people heard my Southern accent, they always wanted to deduct 100 IQ points.

That's the great thing about a tractor. You can't really hear the phone ring.

You may be a redneck if... your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.

You know you're a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn't.

You might be a redneck if...your belt buckle weighs more than three pounds.

Pride is the first step in people unraveling and companies unraveling and relationships unraveling.

If your idea of a 7 course meal is a bucket of KFC and a sixpack, you might be a redneck.

You might be a redneck if your grandmother can correctly execute the sleeper hold.

Watching a baby being born is a little like watching a wet St. Bernard coming in through the cat door.

You might be a redneck if going to the bathroom involves shoes and a flashlight.

In the biological sense, race does not exist.

Never throw fruit at someone who understands the theatrics of the situation better than you do.

I get angry about stuff, I get very emotionally intense about stuff and that's how I get it out - with books, with the band, on my own onstage, but it's always kind of a wail.

Fear is the white lipp'd sire Of subterfuge and treachery.

Let your desires be ruled by reason.

I think one's sexuality can be the center of life, and coming out and discovering your sexuality is something that really can define your existence.

A crush is just as simple as admiration. You get attracted to another person and time can allow feelings to grow more into something more than that.

Bill Clinton, Mr. Bob Dole, You too old to understand tha way tha game is told.

The cause of justice is the cause of humanity. Its advocates should overflow with universal good will. We should love this cause, for it conduces to the general happiness of mankind.