You might be a redneck if your local ambulance has a trailer hitch.

I used to say that whenever people heard my Southern accent, they always wanted to deduct 100 IQ points.

That's the great thing about a tractor. You can't really hear the phone ring.

You may be a redneck if... your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.

You know you're a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn't.

You might be a redneck if...your belt buckle weighs more than three pounds.

Pride is the first step in people unraveling and companies unraveling and relationships unraveling.

If your idea of a 7 course meal is a bucket of KFC and a sixpack, you might be a redneck.

You might be a redneck if your grandmother can correctly execute the sleeper hold.

Watching a baby being born is a little like watching a wet St. Bernard coming in through the cat door.

You might be a redneck if going to the bathroom involves shoes and a flashlight.

Wisdom is not in intelligence but in simplicity.

Hiding white lies only causesanxiety and low self- esteem.Melissa Mae Palmer (on living with a mysterious illness and not telling a soul)

No matter how hard you try, you can’t please everyone”.

I am neither especially clever nor especially gifted. I am only very, very curious.

I'm a terrible lip-syncer anyway because I have to be in the moment, and I can't lip-sync to something I recorded three months before.

The more accurately you can think about who you are, what you want to accomplish and how to accomplish it, the more successful you will be.

My doctor asked me if I smoked, and I said only when I'm working, golfing, or drinking. Then I realized the only time I don't smoke is when I'm home. I didn't even realize I'd become a smoker.

As President Bush has said on numerous occasions, it is the government's role to create the conditions, the friendly environment, that will attract capital.

You can't be deep without a surface

We were not born to sue, but to command.