You must pay for your sins. If you have already paid, please ignore this notice.

Don't watch the clock; do what it does. Keep going.

The reason grandparents and grandchildren get along so well is that they have a common enemy.

The simplest toy, one which even the youngest child can operate, is called a grandparent.

If you want to know how your girl will treat you after marriage, just listen to her talking to her little brother.

Insanity is hereditary; you get it from your children.

It's a good thing that when God created the rainbow he didn't consult a decorator or he would still be picking colors.

If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the up button.

You must learn from the mistakes of others. You can't possibly live long enough to make them all yourself.

Siblings: children of the same parents, each of whom is perfectly normal until they get together.

We may not always see eye to eye, but we can try to see heart to heart.

The seed of the gift may come, but a seedling that isn't nourished dies quickly.

Lord, forgive us for the times we have read about Gethsemane with dry eyes.

Holding onto what was isn't healthy for what is.

As the welfare state is hollowed out, a culture of compassion is replaced by a culture of violence, cruelty and disposability.

You must always remember, the most important fashion accessory is the condom.

It doesn't matter what songs we sing. I'm a drummer. Chicks dig me.

I'm not going to wait on anybody to put out music or a visual. Everything I will do is on my own. I'm not waiting on anyone.

Bad news is just an excuse.

The only [working] ritual is making tea. I use the loose leaves and drink it by the gallon.

I spent my entire life working with the smallest budget I could get. Just working with old, junky, donated equipment. The only things I bought myself were the trumpet and the $9 ukulele.