You never want to be the grumpy guy, although I do have quite a grumpy face.

Say what you want about the deaf.

The tragedy for comedians is there's nothing more they want than to be liked. We desperately seek approval. It's almost like a personality disorder you can do as a job.

My girlfriend bought a cook book the other day called 'Cheap and easy vegetarian cooking'. Which is perfect for her, because not only is she vegetarian.

British scientists have demonstrated that cigarettes can harm your children. Fair enough. Use an ashtray!

A lady with a clipboard stopped me in the street the other day. She said, 'Can you spare a few minutes for cancer research?' I said, 'All right, but we won't get much done.'

I said to my girlfriend, you shouldn't eat before you swim. She said, "why not"? I said, you look fat.

I'm not being condescending, I'm too busy thinking about far more important things you wouldn't understand.

I saw that show, 50 Things To Do Before You Die. I would have thought the obvious one was 'Shout For Help'.

If only Africa had more mosquito nets then every year we could save millions of mosquitoes from dying needlessly of aids.

People with Tourettes.....What makes them tick?

Life is all about the choices we didn't make

When you are independent you learn strategies of self empowerment

Better give a shilling than lend and lose half a crown.

Before I met my husband, I'd never fallen in love. I'd stepped in it a few times.

The people who are doing the work are the moving force behind the Macintosh. My job is to create a space for them, to clear out the rest of the organization and keep it at bay.

I've experienced plenty of times when something I think is funny doesn't do very well. And there are times when something I don't think is funny makes the audience laugh so hard.

People thought I was dead. But I wasn't. I was just directing "The A-Team."

I'm definitely curious. I love pop culture. I'm glued to it. I can watch garbage TV, but then I can also watch great theater.

A passion for pleasure is the secret of remaining young.

We often get blinded by the forms in which content is produced, rather than the job that the content does.