You see, time is an ocean, not a garden hose. Space is a puff of smoke, a wisp of cloud.
David Wong, John Dies at the End
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Other quotes of David Wong, John Dies at the End
Something coming back from the dead was almost always bad news. Movies taught me that. For every one Jesus you get a million zombies.
Son, the greatest trick the Devil pulled was convincing the world there was only one of him.
To this day I don’t know if he was struggling with the moral implications of gunning down half a dozen civilians, or if he was mentally counting to see if he had that many shells left in the gun.
When a man plans, a woman laughs.
Welcome to freakdom, Dave. It’ll be time to start a Web site soon, where you’ll type out everything in one huge paragraph.
Here’s exclusive Channel 5 video of a local man having his brain eaten by a winged gremlin. Local gremlin experts warn that—
... life is a flickering candle we all carry around. A gust of wind, a meaningless accident, a microsecond of carelessness, and it's out. Forever.
My melon soulCrushed by your Gallagher of apathy
I'm scared David""That's good, because there's lots to be afraid of
I tried to say something cool, wound up stammering something like, “WANNA YOU WANNA WEENIE ME?” The end kind of trailed off in a shrill, choking warble.
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