You've got to be careful smoking weed. It causes memory loss. And also, it causes memory loss.

Next in importance to having a good aim is to recognize when to pull the trigger.

They say there are about 12 million illegal immigrants in this country. But if you ask a Native American, that number is more like 300 million.

Are we sure this is a good time to take God out of the Pledge of Allegiance?

I feel like Bush presidencies are like "Godfather" films. You should stop at two.

I was Christmas shopping and ran into a guy on the street. I noticed his watch and said that it runs slow. He said, "So does the guy I stole it from."

President Bush says he needs a month off to unwind. Unwind? When the hell does this guy wind?

Traffic signals in New York are just rough guidelines.

The White House is giving George W. Bush intelligence briefings. You know? some of these jokes just write themselves.

Way too much coffee. But if it weren't for the coffee, I'd have no identifiable personality whatsoever.

Somebody threw a book at President Obama. If you're trying to scare a president by throwing a book at him, you're one president too late.

There can never be any real freedom on earth as long as people try to exert ownership over the natural resources of the world.

dragonflies circled me, the sun knifing off the brilliant blues and yellows of their bodies.

Hunting hawks did not belong in cages, no matter how much a man coveted their grace, no matter how golden the bars. They were far more beautiful soaring free. Heartbreakingly beautiful.

I'm an only child, you know, originally. I'm not a child anymore, but I certainly tend to spend a lot of time on my own.

As for this," Magnus said sliding the stele into Jace's jeans pocket, "keep it in your pants, Shadowhunter." - 219

Blessed is he who carries within himself a God, an ideal, and obeys it.

If I played in New York, they'd name a candy bar after me.

But as coaches, we need to get a little more fire and passion and be more demanding that our guys get the job done. I think players will respond to that, and we'll see.

Unless you try to do something beyond what you have already mastered, you will never grow. Every job is a self portrait of the person who did it ... Autograph your work with excellence.

We will reduce the White House staff by 25 percent