You've got to embrace the future. You can whine about it, but you've got to embrace it.

Son, if you really want something in life, you have to work for it. Now quiet, they're about to announce the lottery numbers.

The scary thing about the future... there will be tiny cameras everywhere, and they'll be flying around like mosquitoes and drones. That will be bad. Drones are scary. You can't reason with a drone.

Vampires are make-believe, like elves, gremlins, and eskimos.

God often gives nuts to toothless people.

Donuts. Is there anything they can't do?

America's health care system is second only to Japan, Canada, Sweden, Great Britain, well ... all of Europe. But you can thank your lucky starts we don't live in Paraguay!

Love is a snowmobile racing across the tundra and then suddenly it flips over, pinning you underneath. At night, the ice weasels come.

You should listen to your heart, and not the voices in your head.

I’ll keep it short and sweet - Family. Religion. Friendship. These are the three demons you must slay if you wish to succeed in business.

We've got a bunch of new writers now who tell me they grew up watching The Simpsons. It's bizarre, and they're writing some very funny stuff.

It is no use setting priorities if you won’t stick to them.

Severed and gone, so many years! And art thou still so dear to me, That throbbing heart and burning tears Can witness how I cling to thee?

Films can't change the society they can simply open the space for the discussion which can lead to social change and can start new forms of social activism.

People do not realize this, but my drug addiction was actually a short span of time. It was only for two years.

It's amazing what a spray-on tan will do.

You may think a crime horrible because you could never commit it. I think it is horrible because I could commit it.

I defy any woman who is pregnant and trying to concentrate really hard not to feel distracted.

One day, a daughter of Aristotle, Pythias by name, was asked what color pleased her most. She replied, "The color with which modesty suffuses the face of simple, inoffensive men.

Don't do something that you'll regret later.

My view of Bradley Manning is that he's a very courageous young man who... did what I didn't have the guts to do during the Vietnam war.