You want everyone to be great and funny. I'm not saying I'm great, but I'm funny.

You, the actor, must be aware of when you're being funny, but the character you're playing should always be oblivious to the fact.

Nobody with a victim mentality will get anywhere. Ever. They will never succeed.

I feel lucky that I'm working at all. I don't take any job for granted. I enjoy this. It's all enjoyable for me. It's all part of it.

The problem with the economy isn't that people aren't paying their fair share of taxes.

I would love to have a part opposite a great actor - like, say, Pacino or De Niro or Hoffman. And to work with a top director. That's my dream.

My dad would always say, 'What can you do to make the world a better place?' Well, I can make people laugh.

If you build it, nerds will come.

I didn't take anything from anyone - first of all. Second of all, I opened a comedy club with money that I saved over 25 years. I created jobs.

Sometimes the best way to make 'em laugh is to show 'em how you honestly feel.

Apparently, I said what a lot of people are thinking and a lot of people have thanked me.

Mustafa Kemal drily reminds his co-conspirators that the object is not to die for the revolution, but to live for it.

It's a sad man my friend who's livin' in his own skin and can't stand the company.

Having someone you love say "Thank you" is more rewarding than just having them say "I love you.

I grew up in my mom's third grade classroom and always helping her, and I also got a passion for kids that way.

The deadly Hydra now is the hydra of Equality. Liberty, Equality and Fraternity is the three-fanged serpent.

I would like for my books to have been recognized posthumously, at least in capitalist countries, where they turn you into a kind of merchandise.

The quantity of force which can be brought into action in the whole of Nature is unchangeable, and can neither be increased nor diminished.

Application of humility is service.

FANTASTIC! There is such clarity and so much humor in Stetch’s playing! I have always loved that about him.

You know what the secret to weight loss is? Don't eat much.