You work, you get paid, you drink.

People are like music, some speak the truth and others are just noise.

Alcohol is really just the liquid version of Photoshop.

Whatever you do, always give 100%. Unless you're donating blood.

Friendship is so weird. You just pick a human you've met and you're like, 'Yep, I like this one,' and you just do stuff with them.

I'm a nut, but not just a nut.

Common sense is like deodorant. The people who need it most never use it.

You know how funerals are not for the dead, they’re for the living? Bachelor parties are not for the groom, they’re for the uncommitted.

You can tell how boring a person is by the lack of fear in their eyes when someone is flipping through photos on their phone.

Just beat my record for most consecutive days without dying.

The secret is to have a sense of yourself, your real self, your unique self. And not just once in a while, or once a day, but all through the day, the week and life.

If you're going to be crazy, you have to get paid for it or else you're going to be locked up.

Women. They're irresistible that's for sure, and they love to remind us that they are the keepers of our desires.

Other sports play once a week but this sport is with us every day.

I've had the same friends I've always had. I mean, I've lost a few over the years.

I like Mitt Romney. He looks like the guy who comes with the picture frame.

There are floods of praise coming in as well as criticism.

The sad thing is that many of us come to Christ because we are sinners, and then spend the rest of our lives trying to pretend that we are not!

It is usual for a Man who loves Country Sports to preserve the Game in his own Grounds, and divert himself upon those that belongto his Neighbour.

I'm channelling my 14-year-old self. She's thinking about putting on her big hoop earrings and baggy pants and going to the mall downtown.

Hunger is never delicate.