if I inflict wounds, I heal them.

Not to find pleasure in serious reading gives a pastel coloring to the mind.

There is no real evil in life, except great pain; all the rest is imaginary, and depends on the light in which we view things

The heart has no wrinkles.

We are never satisfied with having done well; and in endeavoring to do better, we do much worse.

If we could have a little patience, we should escape much mortification; time takes away as much as it gives.

When I step into this library, I cannot understand why I ever step out of it.

There are twelve hours in the day, and above fifty in the night.

I dislike clocks with second-hands; they cut up life into too small pieces.

I know of no sorrow greater than that occasioned by a delay of the post.

... we ought to be astonished at nothing; for what do we not meet with in our journey through life?

Sometimes a smile is all that is needed to change a person’s day and it cost me nothing to give.

Happiness is a hard master, particularly other people's happiness.

When life hands you lemons - SQUAT! Squats make everything better. And if squats don't, bacon will

And yet the true creator is necessity, which is the mother of invention.

I am an ardent recycler. I would like to think that it works. I don't know whether it does or not.

I liked to drive around, just playing music for everyone.

Things that are holy are revealed only to men who are holy.

The middle of the road is for yellow lines and dead armadillos.

But big people’s illnesses are always made to sound big. The simple shutting and opening of the royal arse-hole was made to sound as if the world was coming to an end.

People are smarter than you think. Give them a chance to prove themselves.