[...] the awesome splendor of the universe is much easier to deal with if you think of it as a series of small chunks.

There's a saying that all roads lead to Ankh-Morpork. And it's wrong. All roads lead away from Ankh-Morpork, but sometimes people just walk along them the wrong way.

The worst thing you can do is nothing.

There are times in life when people must know when not to let go. Balloons are designed to teach small children this.

Rincewind had always been happy to think of himself as a racist. The One Hundred Meters, the Mile, the Marathon -- he'd run them all.

Rincewind could scream for mercy in nineteen languages, and just scream in another forty-four.

Tourist, Rincewind decided, meant ‘idiot.

...and the funny thing was that people who weren't entirely certain they were right always argued much louder than other people, as if the main person they were trying to convince were themselves.

The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.

I have, before now, waited for a pen to perform a macro.

You never knew about people, like you never knew how deep a pond was because all you saw was the top.

Your daily habit is one of the most important predictors of the quality of your life.

Laa shay'a waqi'un moutlaq bale kouloun moumkine' -the Wisdom of our Creed is revealed through these words - 'We work in the Dark, to serve the Light. We are Assassins.' --Machiavelli

Faith is in the eye of the beholder.

I have two or three shows that I follow, and even those are few and far, when I can see them on Netflix. I don't really watch anything on TV. It's not really a priority for me.

Let's not imitate others.Let's find ourselves and be ourselves.

I spend more time in the kitchen than I have in the dining room, for obvious reasons, however, I just want to sit and indulge.

Reserved as he [Confucius] was about the supernatural, he was not without it; somewhere in the universe there was a power that was on the side of right.

Sometimes audiences love you because they get to boo you.

You know what happiness is: 'Having a little more money than your colleagues.' And that's not so tough in academic life.

When I swing at a golf ball right, my mind is blank and my body is loose as a goose.