welcome to the FAYZ. Wherever, whenever or whyever that is

She was no longer theirs. She was his. And he was hers. And this was their world.

I had a polynomial once. My doctor removed it.

And yes, we do have some food. Maybe you'd like to join us? Unless you want to stick with your sheep sushi.

If God gives you a Quiznos, can I have a bite? No way. You have to pray for your own food.

A man without pleasure is a man without any idea what life is about

Slice and Dice, Slice and Dice

It's vital to keep a sense of humour when the world seems to have suddenly become a very strange place.

Let me guess: you're secretly a wizard who was raised by muggles.

Ninth graders with machine guns: its hard to make that a happy story.

[Caine] "Interesting. Me, I've always wanted to know who my real parents were." [Sam] "Let me guess: you're secretly a wizard who was raised by muggles.

I don't care so much about what you can stand or what you can manage as I do about what you like and want to have. Those are the kinds of things I want to give you, because I'm crazy about you.

Progress? Oh, I think so. The iceman melteth.

Sincerity is the foundation of the spiritual life.

I was punched breathless by the strongest emotions I have ever felt and they are now stored in my intuition as a writer.

Metal is easily my favorite thing - Exodus and Anthrax and Megadeth - so it just kind of organically came through in the standup act.

Managers who are skilled communicators may also be good at covering up real problems.

The pioneer kills what he loves.

Crafty men condemn studies; Simple men admire them; And wise men use them: For they teach not their own use: but that is a wisdom without them, and above them, won by observation.

If you buy a DVD you have a copy. If you want a backup copy you buy another one.

I don't know why people think I'm a Goth - that's a misconception.